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As ever much is going on in my life, and as ever I am trying to cull activities that need to go. Recently, with work, study and ministry some fiends were concerned about me taking on an area within ministry because of my busyness. Whether I end up taking on that area or not is irrelevant to me. But what isn’t, is the fact that I don’t want to be so busy doing things Max’s wants to do, in ministry or outside, that I have no room for the things that I think God wants Max to do. So in the words of a certain song writer, times they are a changin.

Work it is a changin', as I shall be ending my contract at Great Ormond Street Hospital for Children which is a very sad thing. It's my decision and a wise one I hope, but I shall be sad to leave both friends and the hospital behind. GOSH has been good for me and I hope in turn have been able to give theme value for money. I think it is both right for me and seems to be a time that is right for GOSH, where my future would be uncertain anyway. I am never truly happy when leaving behind a contract, and often look back to see how I would do things differently. I do hope that on the whole I brought some benefit. Moving forward I shall be joining a new customer who is in the middle of a major transition. It will mean road travel rather then train, but overall will be less time traveling each day, by an hour or so.

CBSA (my web company) it is a changin', as I step back from the web work. My web work, developing sites, and consulting on Internet technologies has all way been a passion as well as a source of income. I had always planned to keep this string to my bow moving forward, as an extra source of income, but increasingly have felt ill at peace with this idea. Over the last year and again In particular whilst away last week I began to question whether the willingness to drop this (at least for a season) was not more about an escape route then anything else. I think that part of my wish to hold on to it, is about a concern as to whether God will provide in my ministry in the future. I somehow justified that Paul was a tent maker so it was OK. But actually Paul gave up the right to an income (1 Corinthians 9:13-18) through his ministry; he did not have an escape route. I am not suggesting for one moment that Pastors should not have any other income, I think this is more about me putting my faith in God, and I do hope that a time will come in the future when I can pick it up again. I have worked closely with a new young designer over the last year, and will be handing any old and new customers to him as I remove myself from this business over the next year. I will still host my own and close friends sites, which is not part of the income source.

Finally and not entirely tied in with the theme of time, waistlines they are a changin', or at least they had better. The eagle eyed amongst you will have spotted what I have entitled, "embarrassment accountability" section on my home page. I had a conversation with someone who I shall loosely called a mate whilst away last week. It was the usual mucking around in a pub after dinner and he asked how much I weighed. He nearly split his sides when I said just over 13 stone. Words like "never" and "no way" are not kind. I really did think I weighed about that, so I was gob smacked when I stood on the scales the other day and weighed over a stone more. So back to exercise and eating more sensibly it is, after the long time off with the knee last year. If you are sad enough to want to see how I am doing you can at www.cross.org.uk, or you can simple use it to ridicule me.

So the times they are a changin', aren’t they always?

It's 7 oclock in the morning on 25th December 2011. Yes it's Christmas day and I am the only one awake. I've been awake for an hour now which tends to be my normal rising time, even when not a work day. However it does seem funny, as I look back over the years to know that the three great kids (one is nearly 18) are still snuggled in bed asleep on Christmas day. Their Mum often wakes with me, but after the busyness of the celebrations that come with being a Children’s worker, this year she slumbers as well.

So I turn to you my friends at this time and wish you a very happy day, on what I often term the Main Mans birthday. As I do so I think of friends old, some in the time that we have known each other, some in the their years. Friends who took us under their wing, as we became new parents and believers within the same couple of years, nearly eighteen years ago. Their ailments never seem to completely leave them now, but their wisdom has also remained the same, and I am grateful for the gift of their input in my life. Friends who are old because they have known us for a long time, some of whom we will meet tomorrow at the "Hamsters Nose". They know the daft stuff I have done in the past. The Bus in the fort, the frequent exits from moving motorbikes, the loud, brash, attention seeking yet nervous lad that a slightly fraught school life produced. I thank you for the gift of sticking around for the long haul. Finally friends who have just recently joined, many of you will bring wisdom and some of you will stay for the long haul and for that I am also grateful. Some of you are just passing through, and I will treasure the time we have together. I thank you for your gift of friendship in the now.

What of my gift to you? If you have been around for more then two minutes, you will know that the chances of a card at Christmas or on your birthdays are remote. It’s probably not fair that I project my lack of interest in a piece of pre printed sentiment on to you, but hey it is you who choose to be my friend, so I hope your will forgive me. This year as you may know if you are on Facebook the money we don't spend on cards is going to http://www.greatlakesoutreach.org and the work they do in Burundi. Perhaps I should take after Wendy & Mark and send a newsletter each year. It's something we read with eagerness when it turns up. But Wendy is way better prepared then I am. Lets be real even this note, is because I happen to be up on my own early on Christmas day. My faith would suggest that my gift to you would be telling you about the love of Jesus, and my whole heart cries out that you investigate what that would mean to you. But then again you are probably already aware that I would desire this, and it’s your choice. I guess my gift to you is that Ill do what I can. I am by no means any sort of example of what a Christian should be, or even just what good bloke should be. But today my gift to you is if you need me, Ill do what I can. It’s not much, but as I begin to hear the noises of a waking house I hope you enjoy unwrapping it. Oh and I do wish you a Happy Christmas on the Main Mans Birthday.

Love Max.

Wow it has been a while to say the least. My Bishops Advisory Panel was way back in May. As my update to that post said, they did recommend me form training. So of to STETS I went in early September to begin my training. A three year distance-learning course where I am supposed to study 17 hours a week on top of the 9-5 (if only) job. At the end of that apparently I shall “be equipped” to be a leader within the Church. From what I understand I might be equipped to begin learning about being a leader with the Church, but you have to start somewhere.

Anyway just as I began the study, my 9-5 stopped even pretending that it was going to only take 40 hours a week from me. I ended up doing 6 or 7 days a week, and working late into the night most days, squeezing what little study I could into my life on the train journeys. The long and short of it was that my study got of to a bad start, and the bags under my eyes developed a deep darkness that worried me, let alone my family. My family rallied around me despite my grumpiness and lack of attentiveness to them, and yes we did get through it.

There were times mind you; that I really did not know how I was going to get through the next 24 hours without exploding of exhaustion or frustration. It was at these times that I finally remembered that I was supposed to have handed this stuff over to God. Funny how amongst the slow build of these things, we can forget that God is there for us all the time, not just in the disasters. This came to mind last night in cell group. We were putting together our own modern day Psalms as a reflection of our worship. I am no poet, and I literally wrote it down within 5 minutes, so it’s certainly no masterpiece. But looking back at it, I realised it did come out of the last few months of my life. I called it Psalm 151, not because it is supposed to replace Psalm 151 from the Septuagint, but because most translations of the Psalms finish at 150. For what it’s worth here it is:

Psalm 151

God you are above all things.
Your power is greater then thunder.
You can be trusted more then gold.
You are always the same.

Lord I was tired and at the end of my tether
You came and reached out to me.
I didn't known which way to turn.
You told me it would be ok.

Why would you do this for me lord?
Why is it that you seek me out?
Why do you care to pick me up?
What am I to you?

Father your care is beyond my understanding.
Lord you your steadfastness is a rock to me.
Spirit your comfort in the dark, is needed by me.
God you are my one true light, and I seek to know you more.

I am glad to say that things have returned to a more normal busy, rather then stupid busy. Study is back on track and my family now recognise who I am. I am also happy to report that a recent short break in Turkey, enabled me to make my apologies to my family, and God.

Not entirely a post that relates to my journey, but more a tool that I use daily or in reality hourly, whilst I travel on this journey of mine.

I am a big user of my iPad and am constantly asked what applications I use. I always kept a note of these in my Evernote account to email people who asked. Then it dawned on me that others may find it useful, so I decided to post it somewhere. These are not the only apps, but they are the apps that see daily use, and have stuck around whilst others have come and gone. I have not included the built in apps such as safari, mail and calendar which as you could imagine also get constant use.

There is obviously a biase towards my interests, but for what it's worth here is the list.

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Home Screen
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Dropbox - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/dropbox/id327630330?mt=8
Access files away from my PC that I have saved into my Dropbox folder. Use htttp://www.CBSA.net/dropbox to sign up for a FREE Dropbox account, or your toes will fall off.

Evernote - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/simplenote/id289429962?mt=8
Create and syncronise to cloud different notes I user for everything other then my diary which I use SimpleNote for, because Simplenote integrates TextExpander.

Or

SimpleNote - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/simplenote/id289429962?mt=8
Create and syncronise to cloud basic text notes works with TextExpander.

GoodReader - £2.99 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/goodreader-for-ipad/id363448914?mt=8
General Document reader. PDFs / Doc etc. Can sync to DropBox. Can annotate pdfs and now has tabs for multiple pdfs.

Calculator4 - .59p - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/calculator-4-ipad-edition/id387648188?mt=8
There is no calculator on the iPad. Free ones are available, I just like this advert and clutter free version.

Twitter - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/twitter/id333903271?mt=8
Twitter client.

Gmail Short Cut. - FREE - http://mail.google.com
The iPad version of Gmails client is great. Goto the URL in Safari. Tap on the icon at the top eft of the page that looks like a box with an arrow coming out of it. Select "Add to Home Screen".

Facebook short cut - FREE - http://www.facebook.com
Goto the URL in Safari. Tap on the icon at the top eft of the page that looks like a box with an arrow coming out of it. Select "Add to Home Screen".

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Reading
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BibleReader - .59p - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/biblereader/id287455446?mt=8
As it says from Olive Tree. Bibles in the price range of $20 comes with KJ

or

Bible - Free - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/bible/id282935706?mt=8
More basic interface, but integrates with the great www.youversion.com. Incredibly offers versions like ESV for free offline reading. Improving all the time.

Reeder - £1.79 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/reeder/id325502379?mt=8
Synronise with Google news feeds.

Kindle - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/kindle/id302584613?mt=8
I prefer Amazon books to iBooks.

Early Edition - £2.99 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/the-early-edition/id363496943?mt=8
I use this to create a daily paper from news feeds.

InstaPaper - £2.99 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/instapaper/id288545208?mt=8
Install the InstaPaper shortcut in your browser and clip websites for reading later. I mainly purchased this to support the developer. I generally pump the RSS feed from my free http://www.instapaper.com account into my RSS reader.

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Office
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QuickOffice Pro HD - 8.99 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/quickoffice-pro-hd/id376212724?mt=8
I switched to Quick Office for word, excel, powerpoint editing etc from DocsToGo slightly nicer DropBox integration and layout.

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Entertainment
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BBC iPlayer - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/bbc-iplayer/id416580485?mt=8
Plays BBC content. Not offline ;-(

4oD Catch Up - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/4od-catch-up/id432494037?mt=8
Plays Channel 4 content. Not offline ;-(

ITV Player - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/itv-player/id446079916?mt=8
Plays ITV content. Not offline ;-(

BBC News FREE http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/bbc-news/id377382255?mt=8
Nice front end to the BBC news site.

Downcast - £1.19 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/downcast/id393858566?mt=8
I prefer to manage my podcasts outside of iTunes. No real reason other then I like to be able to update them away from my PC.

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Games - Heads up I'm not a real games person.
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Words HD - £1.79 / FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/words-with-friends-hd/id364140796?mt=8
Scrabble like game.

Chess.com - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/chess.com-play-learn-chess/id329218549?mt=8
Play against online opponents for free.

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Utilities
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Textexpander - £2.99 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/textexpander/id326180690?mt=8
Integrates into some applications to allow macro insertion of text. Less useful for the non geeks now that IOS5 allows you to add your own corrections to the dictionary database.

LogMeIn Ignition - £17.99 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/logmein-ignition/id299616801?mt=8
Worth every penny if you want access to your home PC whilst on the road. Get a free LogMeIn account and you can remote control your home PC, or simply access the files on it. Obviously requires your home PC to be on and a free app to be installed.

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Honourable Mention (Used less these days)
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QuickShot - -
Camaera apps that syncs to Dropbox. I use for document scanning into Dropxbox.

AllRecipes - FREE - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/id399919379?mt=8
Fun front end for www.AllRecipes.com

Documents To Go £5.99 - http://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/documents-to-go-office-suite/id317117961?...
Office suite editor. I use QuickOffice more these days.